WASHINGTON, D.C. – Since March of 2019 the words resilience, resilient and resiliency have flooded our conversations about how to respond to a global pandemic, catastrophic wildfires, climate change and (even more overused) a new normal. If we are to talk about behavioral health and well-being, I feel it is important to have a clear understanding of our terminology. These are my thoughts on what resilience is and isn’t.

5 essential factors for building and maintaining resilience
Resilience is the capacity to prepare for, adapt to and recover from stress, trauma, adversity or challenge. Rather than a fixed characteristic, resilience is a capacity that we potentiate with lifelong practice. It represents our ability to meet the challenges we encounter each day, trusting we have both internal and external resources to weather those challenges with the least amount of negative consequences to our own bodies, hearts and minds.

Being resilient also means we can hold space for whatever our experiences might be, regardless of what they look like from the outside. It is a process of:

1. Recognizing when we are activated or overwhelmed
2. Honoring the appropriateness of that response
3. Knowing that it means our capacity might feel less than or diminished in the moment
4. Using whatever tools and strategies we can muster to support ourselves when in a state of vulnerability

When the term resilience is misused, it can confuse and undermine efforts to improve or maintain our well-being. That’s why it’s also essential to understand what resilience is not. Here are four things resilience is not.

What resilience isn’t
Resilience is not about being strong. You may be familiar with Aesop’s fable about the braggadocious oak tree and the humble reeds. The oak tree boasted of being strong, stout and unbending during storms. However, while the reeds were not strong, their flexibility and adaptability helped them survive a great hurricane during which the oak was felled. Resilience is about being more like the reeds instead of the oak.

Resilience is also not grit, which is a sustained, consistent effort toward a goal. Perseverance can be a valuable ability but can cause harm when the right action would be to change direction or reevaluate the goal. Resilience involves knowing when to persevere and when to pivot or use different tactics.

Resilience is not the solution to toxic leadership or an abusive work environment. These types of damaging environments can quickly erode team members’ resilience no matter what they do. While some people can survive this type of work environment, they will not thrive. In this situation, resilience is a Band-Aid on a gaping wound. Leaders need to remove toxic individuals and improve the work environment before they focus on building resilience.

Finally, resilience is not all about you. Someone who is highly resilient can harm people with low resilience if they are not careful. Focusing only on your well-being contributes to narcissism and success at the expense of your team. We can be so good at taking care of ourselves that we neglect those around us or put too much pressure on people with unrealistic expectations. The best resilience ensures the health and well-being of everyone on our teams and in our communities.

We have to work to build our resilience. We have to work at it regularly. It is strengthened when we recognize and normalize the brilliant ways in which our nervous system is working tirelessly (well, seemingly tirelessly) on our behalf. Our bodies innately hold the potential for resilience. We need only train and practice tapping into that innate potential by learning how to work respectfully and in partnership with our physiology.

Fortunately, resilience is not a character trait that some are just lucky to have. It is a state of being that can change over time depending on your environment and actions. Everyone can develop resilience by mastering certain skills and making time for resilience enhancing activities and recovery. Here are five factors essential for building and maintaining resilience.

Building resilience
Daily physical activity, healthy eating, sufficient sleep and recovery from stress are tantamount to both short- and long-term resilience. Scrutinize your daily and weekly routines and make time to focus on each of these components. Recovery is the most overlooked part of daily schedules—it can be as simple as a walk, meditating, breathing or a quiet hobby. Build in short breaks—even just five minutes—into your long workdays and heavy workloads to allow incremental recovery time from periods of high-intensity work.

Your level of resilience directly correlates to your ability to maintain a sense of control. Spend time and energy on issues you can control while letting go of things that are outside of your control (e.g., traffic). As Victor Frankl said, “decisions, not conditions, determine what a [person] is.” Set clear boundaries, communicate them to colleagues, friends and family, and then use your boundaries to say no to requests that would otherwise overwhelm you. Ask for help when you need it.

Find ways to insert meaning and purpose into your daily life. For some this comes from religion or family, while others find it from service, volunteerism or hobbies. Be passionate about something. Be helpful to others.

Social interactions are essential to your well-being and resilience. The depth of individual relationships outweighs the number of connections one has (and that includes your fans, followers and likes on any social media platforms). Nurture your friendships and family relationships and build support among your work colleagues.

Maintaining a positive outlook—opening your mind’s eye to silver linings—builds resilience. Consciously focus on what is going well in your life and positively re-frame the parts that aren’t going as planned. Positive re-framing might require you to zoom your perspective in or out to look at an issue from a different angle. Try a daily gratitude journal exercise or express what you are grateful for to colleagues, friends and family. Laugh often. Why not start now?

“If you boil a funny bone it becomes a laughing-stock, and I find that humerus.”

Christopher Cagle has been a LEO on the Hume Lake Ranger District of the Sequoia National Forest and Giant Sequoia National Monument since January 2008.